In this special kid’s POV edition of the podcast, Asher and I share our best tips and strategies for making travel and vacations run more smoothly. As much as many families and their children may love going on vacation, the change in routine, different foods, shifting expectations, and new stimuli can even turn a trip to “The Happiest Place on Earth” (Disneyland) into one full of stress, anxiety, meltdowns, and other challenges. And while we know this rings true for pretty much any and every family, for parents raising differently-wired kids, the extremes highs and lows can bigger.
In this episode, Asher and I share what we’ve learned over the years when it comes to making sure everyone’s needs and expectations on any given vacation are met, or at the very least, addressed, and walk listeners through the different schedules and planners we’ve we incorporated into our vacation prep. (We also share our planning templates below for free download!). We hope you take away a tip or two to make your next family holiday a more peaceful experience for the whole family!
About Debbie and Asher: Debbie Reber is the founder of TiLT and the host of the TiLT Parenting Podcast. 11-year-old Asher is Debbie’s son and is regularly featured on the podcast. Find out more by visiting the About Page.
THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:
- The benefits of talking through and getting clear on expectations (for all members of the family) prior to leaving for a vacation
- A strategy for using the collaborative problem solving approach to identify, address, and pre-solve concerns ahead of time
- How to make departure day go more smoothly
- The benefits of exploring and researching aspects of a vacation time well in advance of the trip (including accommodations, activities, etc.)
- A strategy for using written schedules coupled with frequent reviews during a vacation keeps everyone’s expectations in check
- The benefits of bringing a child into the planning process (and letting him or her determine some of what will happen on vacation)
- Why it’s useful to work with your child to discover what he or she needs most on vacation and then incorporating it into your daily plan (ie: rest, chill time, etc.)
RESOURCES MENTIONED:
Love this Debbie and Asher! We didn’t travel for years because it was so awful and stressful. We now use variations of many of these same strategies to manage trips better, although I definitely got some ideas that we are going to try!! Thank you for that!
A quick note that might be helpful for families in the US–air travel was a huge barrier for us because of the sensory overload of airports, airplanes, etc, the lines, and the fact that you have little control over what happens once you step into an airport. All sorts of things can throw off your schedule and that would have caused the world to end for our son.
So in advance of our first ever airplane travel with our boys (just this year, with Cory at age 8!), we worked with TSA to set up a thorough preview of the entire experience. They walked us through security, showed Cory how the baggage screening worked and even set off the metal detector so he could hear the alarm. We checked out the boarding area and talked about what happens if a plane gets delayed. Then TSA took us to Delta, who took our entire family onto a plane that had just unloaded. The boys got to check out the cabin, the cockpit, the safety features and got to meet the pilots and crew.
It was amazing. The 90 minutes or so we spent exploring our local airport transformed crippling anxiety into excitement. Still some anxiety of course, but Cory was able to handle it and deal really well with a long travel day. People complain all the time about TSA and the airlines, but I have nothing but positive things to say about the way in which they worked with our family.
To set that up, we contacted our local TSA, which put us in touch with the regional manager. He coordinated all of it for us. It’s something that they do more and more often for families with differently wired kids, having recognized that it helps everything go more smoothly on the actual travel day.
Thanks again for all that you are doing!!
That is such a FANTASTIC tip! Love that you advocated for your child like that and thought outside the box, and love that the TSA was so accommodating. Asher still refuses to go through the body scans at airports and so far we’ve been fortunate that the TSA in every airport we’ve been to has pat him down instead without any questions asked.
Thank you again for sharing 🙂
Oh, I’ve had so many thoughts about this since listening. I was going to keep them to myself…but decided that sharing a bit about our experience with older kids (ok, I admit, they are EMERGING ADULTS at 18 and 20) would help. We recently made a two week trip to Europe with our family of four and extended family. A travel agent planned a lot which NOT how we typically roll. It felt really out of our control and my hub and I made most of the plans (spoiler alert: mistake #1). My hub is a disabled vet who loves to travel, so we took those needs into account, but didn’t think proactively about what our oldest, who has PTS, anxiety and ADHD (all co-mingle as you often note) and second child (ADHD, inattentive and slow processing) might need. The pace of travel was tough on all of us and the white board would have been genius. The hub usually forges ahead with time change, but we learned quickly that daily down time is essential for our big kids. And getting their input is essential to the daily game plan.
Much of what this podcast would have helped. We didn’t take a lot of time in planning… so lesson learned to not skip the pre-planning phases and many of Debbie’s family tips still apply with big kids.
All in all, we had a great time, but there were many melt downs and several lessons…along with laughter and great memories. Thanks for sharing these tips!
Thank you so much for sharing your perspective and experience, Lisa. Glad to know that these strategies have the potential be useful well into the teen years and beyond!